Sometimes I just feel like doing some theological flowing. I get this “burning in the bosom” 😉 that seems to be fueled by a sense of utter worship, and love of Christ. So the following represents my theological throw down for the day (very stream of conscious).
This life is full of continual angst, and grist, of the kind that makes no sense; not really! I was just a boy driving in my low rider from the LBC (Long Beach, California), bumping to the beats of the world, resting in my ecclesial and Christian heritage as the son of a Baptist preacher man. Sure, I loved Jesus, but I thought (with Snoop Dog bumpin’ in the back ground), that I had experienced all there was to being a Christian. You see, I grew up as a Christian, I came to Christ (for real) when I was three and a half, something like God’s call to Samuel (I awoke early in the morning, and knew that I wanted to receive Jesus), and began to grow from that point. But as I said, after high school, in my early twenties, feeling pretty august among the world (I was trying), I thought I had exhausted knowledge of God in Christ. But as I was rolling in the hood, God once again encountered me in the blessed name of His Son, He rattled and shook, till all that was left was my utter dependence on Him! He set my life to a different beat, one He was orchestrating, one that He was turn-tabling. He hasn’t stopped. He still shakes, and strangely (to me), there is still stuff falling from me all around. There is still nowhere to look but Jesus.. Now I read the Bible from dust cover to cover, I read theology, high and low, and I seek to proclaim this reality wherever I go. I work among the bluecollar, as a theologian to the lost; I preach the same Gospel that found me, and His name is Jesus Christ. I have constructed (and am) a personal theology that is grounded in Jesus, but in reality Jesus is doing His personal theology that is grounding me in Him. And yet I fear, I fear that I spend all this time reading and thinking about God in Christ, only in the end to find out that I have been missing Him all along. But then I am comforted, the Lord speaks, and I hear His Shepherd voice; He says that I didn’t seek Him to begin with, He sought me in His Son, and He found me! He speaks to my heart, He says ‘Bobby, teach my people … stay in my Word’, and I tremble. I am full of inadequacy, but He reminds me that He is my adequacy. I sin, and He says that He forgives 70×7, that He is my advocate and there is no condemnation because I am in Him, and if He is for me who can be against me? I am overwhelmed, I worship, and I think about where I once was, where I now am, and where the Lord will take me to be; and I worship! After all of this, God has reminded me that my life is but a vapor, and so while there is opportunity I need to do good! I continue to fail, but I know the God who is in the bosom of the Father, and He explains the Father to me; He has told me to cry out to Him, to call Him ‘Abba’, to come into His throne room of grace boldly in time of need, which is where I find myself continually. I am broken, but Jesus is my fix, every morning His mercies are brand new to me. All I can conclude is that I love Jesus—I love You, Jesus!—you are my life, Lord; you alone speak the words of eternal life, where else can I go?! You are God, I am not! You are my Father.
PS. Picture in post is not my truck, but looks almost exactly like mine, except for the color.